


I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time

by Yellowbirdbluetoo



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Harry can see ghosts, Master of Death Harry Potter, i wouldn’t say master
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-12
Updated: 2019-03-12
Packaged: 2019-11-13 22:44:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18040511
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yellowbirdbluetoo/pseuds/Yellowbirdbluetoo
Summary: Harry screams the first time he sees Fred, chilling at the Weasley’s dining room table as if he hadn’t been dead the past two weeks.-/-orHarry Potter can see ghosts.





	1. Chapter 1

Harry screams the first time he sees Fred, chilling at the Weasley’s dinning room table as if he hadn’t been dead he past two weeks. 

He lets all of the books fall out of his hands, and sinks to the floor, still staring at Fred because ‘this isn’t real. He saw Fred die. He can’t be-‘. 

“Harry? Are you...okay?”. 

Fred’s voice. The only way he could tell them apart before was by their voices, and Ron didn’t understand because he’d grown up hearing them together. He’s leaned down, hands outstretched to help Harry up. 

“”Fred?”. Harry’s voice is quivering, and small, and his hand is definitely shaking as he reaches for Fred, but nothing happens. 

His hand goes right through him, and he just stares. Fred on the other hand gives a tired sort of laugh. “Yeah, didn’t think that would work, sorry”.

“Wha...”. He has to swallow, because he’s going to start crying and it takes him at least a minute to hold the tears down. “What are you d-doing here. H-how are you here?”. He chokes out 

Fred shrugs, and stands back up, and for the first time Harry notices he’s hovering over the ground. “I dunno. I just appear here sometimes. I’ve been a ghost for like, a few days a think?”.

Harry blinks. “But... you died two weeks ago?”.

Fred does a double take, and Harry nearly laughs at his incredulous look. But if he laughs he’ll cry so he doesn’t. 

“I’ve been dead two weeks? No way!”. Fred sits on the floor next to Harry and thunks his head against the wall. Well it makes no sounds, but that’s what he was intending. 

“Maybe time goes by slower?”. He can’t belive he’s talking to a ghost. But this isn’t a ghost. This is Fred. Funny Fred Weasley, who makes people laugh, and fought by Harry’s side during the battle and-

There were those tears. Dammit. 

Fred looks at him panicked. “Hey, c’mon don’t cry. I’m fine. I’m right here! See!”. And yeah Harry can see him, he’s paler, and he’s got this static light around him that makes him look like an illusion. Maybe he finally lost it after all of the childhood trauma. 

“Where is everyone? Where is George? And mum and Ron and-“.

“They went out. Shopping I think? I was asleep so they left me. I haven’t been getting much sleep since... y’know”.

Fred sighs and floats up higher to stretch and Harry lets out a hysterical choked laugh. Because why would a ghost need to stretch? Only Fred Weasley.

“I wanna see them. You don’t mind me waiting around?”. Harry wants to say it’s his house, because it is. His shared room with George is still the same cause he couldn’t stand to sleep there so he’s been staying on the couch. 

He shrugs. “Sure”. He hasn’t completely broken down, but he will. Later. In private. But for now...

Harry begins picking up the books, and manages to stack them on the table. Mrs. Weasley had wanted to sell them. He suspected she just wanted to keep him busy, and as a result he had so far cleaned out the entire shed, and his and Ron’s shared room. He still feels unsatisfied because what’s he going to do when there’s nothing left to fix up?

The door opens suddenly and Harry’s hand goes for his wand in his back pocket and he it aimed directly at Ginny’s face. 

Ron, the worlds best friend, shoots Harry a ‘thanks for the heart attack’ look. Harry has to take four breaths ‘in and out’ as he pulls it back and pockets it again. 

Ginny on the other hand seems thoroughly shaken and has to point her eyes to the floor. Ron puts a hand on her shoulder and tsks. “Told you not to burst in like that. He’s got fast reflexes. But nooo”.

Everyone’s arms are full of things and Harry starts. “Oh hey, their back!”. He yells into the house, not seeing Ron’s confusing look. 

“...Who’re you yelling at? We all left remember?”.

Harry laughs because he’s excited. Fred will get to see his family, and they’ll get to see him everyone will be happy. 

“It’s someone you know. I think they’re upstairs, let me go get them!”. He rushes up the crooked spiral staircase of the Weasley house checking all the rooms and comes to a stop at the top. 

George and Freds room. It’s always got a closed door, only opening briefly so George can get things. 

He opens the door but the words die on his tongue. It’s empty. 

“This doesn’t make sense”. He murmurs. He goes back down to find Ron and before he can even think about saying anything he shuts his mouth. Because how would it sound to Ron if he said he’d seen Fred. 

Ron had been the main Weasley to not break down yet. He only cries in their room at night and Harry hasn’t seen him do it anywhere else. What if this breaks the damn?

What if it’s not even true. What if Harry is crazy? What if he... imagined it?

“Well? Who was it?”.

“Oh, Seamus. Yeah. He was here but he just left. My bad”. Harry lies. Ron has known Harry for so long he doesn’t think he’ll fall for it, but the redhead nods and goes to help unpack the groceries. 

After a deep breath, Harry follows.


	2. Nightmares and realizations

Harry wakes up, a scream shooting from his mouth and tears streaming from his eyes. 

His past has left him with an ample amount of awful things to dream about. It’s a cycle of terror. 

Sometimes it’s Cedric. Others it’s Sirius. Tonight it’s Voldermort, striking him down and killing his friends along with him. 

He’s not afraid of Voldermort, but he’ll always be afraid of what he could do to the people he cares about. 

Ron isn’t in the room tonight, he’s staying with Hermione for the weekend, and Harry is struck with the pang of hurt because yeah, he gets it, they’re dating it makes sense. But he doesn’t have anyone to calm him, to help him breath, to murmur ‘it’ll be okay’ or ‘he’s gone’ because he’d ‘muffliato’d’ the room ages ago. 

He draws his knees up to his chest and struggles to keep his eyes open. He can only take the dreamless sleep potion twice a week without it messing up his system, and today is not one of those days. 

Tears spill onto the bed, and he can’t hold them back because every time he closes his eyes, Ron and Hermione are being.... they’re gone. They’re leaving him behind because he’s extra weight. He’s dangerous to be around. 

Harry Potter the boy who lived? Ha. More like Harry Potter the boy who kills. 

No one is safe around him. Not his parents, not his friends, not Sirius or Cedric. “Harry”. His head shoots up from his knees and his wand is in his hand in the blink of an eye.

“Who said that!”.

He peers around the room with shaky breath, and does a double take when his eyes land on-

“Sirius?”.

Sirius, all pale and glowing but still Sirius, smirks. “In the flesh”. He hesitates. “Well not in the flesh but, you know what I mean”. He’s sitting at the foot of Harry’s bed and is looking at him with concern. 

He doesn’t put his wand down. “What’re you doing here? Are you...”. He swallows. His mouth is suddenly dry and he has to force out the words. “Are you a ghost?”.

Sirius looks down at himself, all glowing and hovering and shrugs. “What does it look like?”.

Harry glares. “Why are you here? Why was Fred here? Am I going crazy or something?”. He needed to focus on his breath or he would start hyperventilating. 

“Harry...”. Sirius-or Sirius’s ghost- reached out to him, but unsurprisingly it goes through, him just like Fred’s hand did. “What happened to you?”.

“I...dunno. All of sudden. Fred Weasley shows up, dead and he disappears before I can show anyone. Now you? I’m losing my mind”.

He sets his wand on his bed and cradles his head in his hands. He couldn’t possibly be losing his mind? Did the battle mess him up that badly? Was it the effect of living his most of his life in awful circumstances?

Sirius sighed. “Harry. Your not going crazy. Something magical is indeed happening to you, but you aren’t losing your mind, I can assure you of that”.

Harry shakes his head, avoiding Sirius’s gaze. “I’m seeing the ghosts of the people I’ve killed, aren’t I?”.

Sirius stopped. “What? Harry you haven’t killed anyone-“.

“Don’t. Lie!”. Harry shouted. “I’ve killed so many. My parents. Tonks and Remus! Fred! Cedric! Hell, even you got killed because of me! I’m a murderer, and this is my punishment! That’s why no one else can see you!”. He breaks down again, sobbing into his arms. He hated this. He hated breaking down, in front of people especially. Very few people got to witness him cry. 

“Harry, it’s okay. I didn’t die because of you, I would’ve willingly gave my life for you any day”. Sirius had moved closer while he’d been crying. 

“The same goes for your parents. And Tonks and Remus knew what they were getting into. Fred and Cedric were killed by Voldermort and his lackeys. None of it should rest on your shoulders”.

Harry knew if he could touch him, he would’ve hugged him. But he didn’t. “Well it does. And I don’t think I’ll ever forgive myself”.

“Well I know that none of the people you’ve named blames you for their death. And I for sure would never blame you”. 

Harry didn’t know what to say to that, but before he can even try Sirius shushes him. “Lay back down, and go to sleep. I’ll make sure that no nightmares find you”.

He-for reasons he can’t explain- does as Sirius says. “Do... do you promise?”. He knows he sounds childish when he says it but he needs to be reassured. Just once. 

Sirius gives him a warm smile. “Promise”.

He doesn’t wake again until morning and Sirius is gone. 

-/-

Harry is a bit unnerved. The morning after Sirius had shown up, he’s actually feeling peaceful, and not incredibly exhausted from the nightmares that plagued him most nights. But right now. 

He hasn’t taken his eyes up from his plate but he can feel all the eyes in the room on him. 

Every Weasley in the house- Ron included- sat at the dining table and shot glanced at him when they thought he wasn’t looking. Ron tried his best to keep up casual conversation but eventually Harry couldn’t take it. He’d been stared at enough in his life. 

“What! Why are you all staring?”.

Ron clears his throat. “Well uh... it’s your hair”.

Mrs. Weasleys sweats at him with a towel. “Ron! You make us sound superficial, Harry’s hair is fine. Just different”.

Harry gave a quizzical look. “What do you mean? It always looks like this?”. They’d all seen him with bed-head before. Well to be fair his hair was horrendous when he woke up but it was always untamable. 

“It’s always been... white?”. Ron asks. “Because I swear I would’ve remembered that for the past few years mate”.

Harry dropped his fork. “White?”. He stood abruptly from the table and nearly tripped over his slippers and he crashed into the downstairs bathroom. He was positive he let out a yell of some kind because his hair was entirely white. Like fresh snow White. Hedwig’s wings white. Afterlife white. 

He rushed back to table, sitting down and shoving a piece of bacon in his mouth. “I don’t wanna talk about it”.

Mrs. Weasley, as if on autopilot, says ‘don’t speak with your mouth full’. No one else says anything about it for the rest of breakfast. 

-/-

“Thanks for meeting with me Luna”. 

It’s a warm sunny day in Britain, thank goodness, and the park they’re meeting at is full of people and children walking and talking. 

Luna smiles at him. “No problem Harry. I’m honestly surprised you wanted to meet up. What with the Hedgemins that’ve been popping up everywhere”.

Harry shrugs. “Why let a Hedgemin ruin a perfectly good day?”. Luna claps her hands together. “Oh! That’s what I’ve been telling people”.

Luna still went on about abnormal things as she did when they were younger, but Harry has learned to appreciate it and go along with them. 

“Luna... I have to ask you something”.

It had been two days since that breakfast at the Weasleys and his discovery of his white hair, which refused to be changed by magic. Hermione had shrieked when she’d seen it. If anyone would know anything about it, something weird and unexplainable, Luna Lovegood would. 

“Oh! Is this about your new hair? I have to say I am loving the new look!”.

“Thanks”. He says awkwardly. “I like yours too”.

Her blonde hair had beet cut to barely reaching her neck and she had seeming dyed the ends a golden orange color. 

“I didn’t plan on it, but thank you!”. She responded cheerfully. 

“I didn’t plan on mine either. It kinda happened on its own?”. Luna have him a weird look. “What do you mean?”.

“I woke up and it was like this. We tried all sorts of things on it but it won’t change back. I was wondering if you might know anything about it, or why it happened since you know so much about certain things?”.

She hummed in thought. “Could be a Hixxle? But they only use bright green. A random curse possibly, but then you’d be able to fix it magically. I can’t really think of anything that would turn your hair white permanently. Not to mention it got your eyebrows too? It could be anything?”.

Harry huffed. “Well, thanks anyways”.

“Did something weird happen to you recently?”.

Harry gave a dry chuckle. “If you count going head to head with the Voldemort and nearly dying then yeah. I’d say something happened to me”. He sighed. “But that was weeks ago”.

Luna hummed again. “Did anything particularly weird happen? Like before Hagrid carried you out of the forest?”.

Her voice had gotten softer, and he was sure it wasn’t for his sake. Sure he and Luna weren’t the best of friends, but if he had seen her being carried out of the forest, in Hagrid arms, still and presumably dead he’d have been shaken to his core as well. 

The only thing to happen in the forest was-

“I died”. The words force themselves out of his mouth. He hadn’t told any one yet, about Voldemort succeeding in killing him. He didn’t die. 

But then he did. He did die, if not for a few minutes or so. He didn’t like to think about it, didn’t take the time to think about it as it was all happening. But he had, hadn’t he?

“You... what?”. Luna has begun to guide them both over to a bench, and he let himself collapse onto it. “I died. In the forest, when Hagrid carried me out, Voldemort thought he had killed me”.

He doesn’t miss her flinch at the name. 

“And he did. For a bit. But I came back. Somehow”.

Luna blinked rapidly and he grabbed her hand. “Hey. It’s okay, I’m okay”. 

Luna shook her head, big envelope earrings swaying. “Of course you are. She gave him a watery smile. “Your right here”. Then she hugged him. 

He hesitated before hugging her back and it must’ve lasted a while before she pulled away. “Harry if... if you died, than that explains why your hair changed. You fought death, in a way. This is what he’s taking from you”.

“My hair color?”. He asked, perplexed. Luna rolled her eyes in a roundabout way. “No. In a way of appearance. I think it’s like a warning. You best avoid death”.

He sighed. “I always try. Why don’t we go grab a bite, all this death talk is kind of depressing me”.

Luna smiles. “Sure! Oh! I can tell you about how well the Quibbler is doing!”. She loops arms with him and he lets her drag him down the street to the town area, feeling lighter than he had in a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m not trying to push Harry/Luna I swear. But uh maybe??
> 
> Also sorry if Sirius is a bit OC I don’t write or read him much. He does care for Harry tho obviously


End file.
